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Golf
Quotes
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| Golf
is played by twenty million mature American men whose
wives think they are out having fun. ~Jim Bishop |
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| I've
spent most of my life golfing .... the rest I've just
wasted. ~Author Unknown |
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| When
I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit.
~Author Unknown |
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I
don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes
they'd come up sliced.
~Author Unknown |
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| They
call it golf because all the other four-letter words were
taken. ~Raymond Floyd |
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| My
handicap? Woods and irons. ~Chris Codiroli |
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| The
ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would
put a flagstick on top. ~Pete Dye |
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| I'm
hitting the woods just great .... but having a terrible
time getting out of them! ~Author Unknown |
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| I
know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer
spectators. ~Gerald Ford |
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| It
took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in
baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.
~Hank Aaron |
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| The
game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets
and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. ~Ernest
Hemingway |
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| Give
me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and
you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~Jack Benny |
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| Have
you ever noticed what golf spells backwards? ~Al Boliska |
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| The
only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf
course. ~Billy Graham |
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| Reverse
every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you
are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close
to having a perfect golf swing. ~Ben Hogan |
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| Go
play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the
ball. Repeat until the ball is in the hole. Have fun.
The end. ~Chuck Hogan |
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If
you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up
the wrong golf ball.
~Jack Lemmon |
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| I
play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't
play. ~Joe E. Lewis |
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It's
good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while
they are still rolling.
~Mark Twain |
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| Don't
play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. ~Harry
Vardon |
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| Golf
is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with
implements ill adapted for the purpose. ~Woodrow Wilson |
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| A
golfer's diet: Live on greens as much as possible. ~Author
Unknown |
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| Gone
golfin' ... be back dark thirty. ~Author Unknown |
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| Born
to golf. Forced to work. ~Author Unknown |
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| My
body is here, but my mind has already teed off. ~Author
Unknown |
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Golf
and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being
good at them.
~Jimmy DeMaret |
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| May
thy ball lie in green pastures ... and not in still waters.
~Author Unknown |
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| If
I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a
hook. If I hit it straight, it's a miracle. ~Author Unknown |
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The
difference in golf and government is that in golf you
can't improve your lie.
~George Deukmejian |
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| Golf
is a game invented by the same people who think music
comes out of a bagpipe. ~Author Unknown |
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| Golf
is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six,
and write down five. ~Paul Harvey |
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